Showing posts from April, 2017

How I feel about Unicorns & Magic

Since there is a frenzy for these brightly colored unicorn specialty drinks going on, I figured it was time to write this blog. The subject of magic has been on my radar a lot these days with the ridiculous amount of it used in children's shows. The TV show magic flat out irritates me. The drink is a temporary novelty that I have absolutely no desire to try or pay for. This issue I have with magical whimsy didn't take effect until maybe a year ago. In my early 20's, I had a small obsession with Tinkerbell. I decorated a room in my house with green walls and a Tinkerbell light switch. I envisioned being able to design the room into a fairy haven. I think I also tried to design my life around a fairy tale idea. There is this optimism portrayed about life that simply doesn't work out for everyone equally. Now when I see a show for a toddler based entirely on magic, I make the extra effort to change the channel or turn the TV off. There are so many subliminal message

How He Sees Me

My day is not going the way I had expected. I had a doctor's appointment that I was anticipating getting over with. It was rescheduled once already from December, and we had to wait for our new insurance to be in effect in April. This appointment is not physically comfortable either but necessary. I am grateful for the option to have this done. But there I was in the waiting room and the doctor was called away. It's not anyone's fault, just the way it is. But still, I wanted to cry. My hopes and expectations built up in this one chunk of my day were about to ruin the whole thing. There are so many moving parts in my life right now that I can hardly think straight.  Luckily, the Dr. can see me on Monday, but I may have to bring the kids with me. I've been feeling guilty asking so much of my mom for babysitting. I think I really should join that Komae app and take the guilt out of finding a sitter. Often I feel like a burden - that my feelings or needs are not import

I Am More

This poem may help you to understand my heart and the purpose of the blog. I actually thought about changing the name of the blog to "More Than Just A Mom" but for now, I am not. Something I notice lately is how often I say or think, "I just" ( I just want to get somewhere on time. I just want you to listen to me so I can keep you safe .), or how often I simply add "just" to a statement. I use it in an exhaustive way but what comes to mind for me is that God is just. That may or may not have anything to do with this poem. Anyways, here is my poem: I Am More I am not the one who has it all together I am more than a beautifully made up face I am designed perfectly by the Creator of the universe I am not the dent in the car or the chip in the paint I am more valuable than any earthly thing I am redeemed by a king who died for me I am not the problems or traumas in my life I am more than the dysfunction in my relationships I am a child of God

Living Loved

There is a song by Hawk Nelson, Live Like Your Loved, that is on the radio lately that speaks to my soul. It is an anthem for living loved. But now I am wondering, what does that look like? Let's look at some of the song lyrics and see. The following are probably the bridges to the song and really the whole song is awesome but, these are my focus for the blog. So go ahead and live like you're loved It's okay to act like you've been set free His love has made you more than enough So go ahead and be who He made you to be Act like you've been set free. I was baptized at 12 but I swear that day was the first day of a long mental prison sentence. I vividly remember waiting up in Jr. Church before it was time for the big moment. I genuinely wanted to give my life to Jesus but I didn't understand how badly the enemy wanted to fight for me. As I sat there, I could feel and imagine the little angel and the devil perched on my shoulders bickering. From that da