Living Loved

There is a song by Hawk Nelson, Live Like Your Loved, that is on the radio lately that speaks to my soul. It is an anthem for living loved. But now I am wondering, what does that look like? Let's look at some of the song lyrics and see. The following are probably the bridges to the song and really the whole song is awesome but, these are my focus for the blog.

So go ahead and live like you're loved
It's okay to act like you've been set free
His love has made you more than enough
So go ahead and be who He made you to be

Act like you've been set free. I was baptized at 12 but I swear that day was the first day of a long mental prison sentence. I vividly remember waiting up in Jr. Church before it was time for the big moment. I genuinely wanted to give my life to Jesus but I didn't understand how badly the enemy wanted to fight for me. As I sat there, I could feel and imagine the little angel and the devil perched on my shoulders bickering. From that day on, I was in a tug of war game for my soul. Oddly, this happened after I chose who it belonged to. But the devil was trying to stop me from reaching my destiny, who He made me to be, from the very get go. 

And live like you know you're valuable
Like you know the one that holds your soul
Cause mercy has called you by your name
Don't be afraid to live in that grace

Live like you know you're valuable. Depending on how you were poured into growing up or what traumas you may have faced, feeling valued could be difficult. There are specific reasons why my view of my value was distorted. It is interesting because looking back I can see just how hard Satan had to work to try to deter me from reaching my purpose. He was after me young and used people to mess with my understanding of the one who holds my soul. I was a people pleaser. I became co-dependant. I thought my worth was more about what I could do for others than anything God might be trying to reveal to me. I was searching and falling short. I knew how to put on the "I've got it all together" act because it was part of my survival but people didn't know just how bad I was hurting. There were specific people that helped me feel that mercy had called me by my name. But I was so afraid to live in that grace. I did not understand grace. Because I was believing all the lies I had been told, I couldn't figure out how to believe, like really believe, in what Jesus did for me. It had become book knowledge and I had to get it into my heart.  I didn't think I was worth the death on the cross, me alone. I kinda lumped myself in like he died for me since he was dying for the world. But someone told me once that Jesus would have died for just me. Amazing. I have to fight the temptation even now to fall into old stinkin thinkin habits and get sucked into lies of the enemy that steal my grace. 

Live like you're loved, walk like you're free
Stand like you know, who he made you to be 
Live like you're loved, like you believe
His love is all, that you ever need

Walk like you're free. Wow, what a visual. Picturing myself when I used to walk with my head down, defeated. Moving about as if I was pulling chains on my ankles. I never had to endure physical chains but I sure had emotional ones. I'm still working on the injuries they left behind, probably will be all my life. But I can stand. I can finally stand like I know who he made me to be. I'm not a walking question mark anymore. I'm standing strong. Strong enough to get on my knees to cry out when I need. Strong enough to admit that I need Jesus more than anything. His love is all that I need! This is so true but took a little longer for me to realize. Once I understood that I was loved and valuable, I still was seeking, like this love was not quite enough. Maybe its because it doesn't seem tangible, physical. I wanted more. Again, I was humbled. Bottom line, I got to a point to acknowledge that no other love will be able to fulfill what the love of Christ can. You can't fill a void with a person, it doesn't work. God is it.

So looking back at my original question, what does it look like to live loved, I have to say it is more an attitude than a feeling. Feelings can get us into trouble. Truth, Biblical truth, is the antidote to the false expectations and lies of the world and the enemy. There is a verse that asks the question, do you believe? John 11:25-26  When I read this, I like the Amplified version because it details "believes in" with "adheres to, trusts in, relies on" and that helps me understand what it is I am saying when I simply say I believe in Jesus. I rely on Jesus. I finally trust in Jesus because I'm learning to accept His love for me. We are called to mature spiritually but I want to say that it took me almost 30 years of my life to get to a point that I trusted that Jesus truly cared for me, so I would encourage you to let His love soak all the way from your head to your toes. Let it really saturate your entire being. His love is legit. Nothing and no one will ever compare.

So now I want to walk with my head up, shoulders down, confident of the love poured out for me. I want to live in a way that others will know that I don't live for this crazy world but for my Father in heaven. I have a purpose and the devil isn't going to deter me.

Dear God, Thank you for dying on the cross for me. I know there are those out there that struggle with doubt about their value and this concept of being loved. It is hard when we feel wounded and damaged and may have been told we are unwanted. Let the truth of Your Holy Word reach those that need it and allow it to penetrate those hearts. Thank you Jesus for rising up and providing the Holy Spirit to dwell in my heart to enable me to function in a world that wants to eradicate You, the Creator. Help me to not sink back and hide but to be completely unashamed of You, my one and only. In Jesus Name, Amen. 

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